26.12.13

Merry Christmas and Keep Calm for Thesis!

Final exam finished. Final paper finished. Organization will be finished in one month (yup, even there's still many responsibility that we have to finish). And the best part is holiday is in my hand.

I am already in holiday mode for five days, while trying to fill up this rest time with a little part-time in my campus, being a watchdog while the rest of students still have subject in their final exams. So, despite that I am already in holiday, I am still going and back to my campus, routinely. You know, it's such a relief that in fact, I am running from the reality that there's a big thing that I have to solve: THESIS.

Yes. Thesis. this one word already haunted me for a month, in my dream and in every thought that I had while I am not thinking any busy things. How come I become such a coward person like this? I have a very big plan and idea about how my thesis would be and who will be my professor, but when it comes, I just can't work it, when it hits its time, I am just delay it like forever. And I am afraid that I could not make it for next semester. I am so scared......

that the fact is I already signed my contract to be an intern with the most busiest auditor firm in this country, and I know that I will have less time to spend my time to focus in writing thesis. I should just say to myself that I could do this but I do not know why.......... I always think I can not do this and change my mind about writing this thesis.

But this thesis is one of things that could help me to gain many things in my next year plan. I have to bear with THIS THING for this semester. Whatever reasons that could come, I can handle this! For the sake of my career and my success in the future. Oh my god, please hold on your self, you can not just give up like this!!

(to be honest, today I supposed to call my professor because I promised to him to discuss about my new topic in phone but I am just can not. I think I have to be more prepare, so I will postpone it for couple of days, and will call him in January. I want to make my self more comfortable and ready with these things. I have to prepare, I have to ready. I have to have no weakness and strong when speaking with him, so he could think that I am ready with these things. And then he will allowed me to use this topic and do this things, confident with it. yes.)

I need a little time to prepare. my heart and my mind. my will and build my motivation.

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So, a day after Christmas and couple of days before new year eve. I do not know what kind of plan I have in that eve, but I hope it will be fun and full of meanings. While I am running from the reality that I have to write my thesis, I am thinking about my plan next year. Considering that next year is very important year for me, many tough decisions that I have to make. Very very important year. 2014, so dangerous.

I know that fact. But two days already wasted for watching korea drama: Reply 1994. You can tell how stupid I am. Yes.. you don't have to tell me, I already knew.

But I want to fix it. I want to write my plan. Just hoping for I can execute them.

at the end, no matter how rough our path, believe that we can make it to the end. Just do not give up and keep think optimist! because God never give you a problem that way bigger than your capability, God knows it and you just have to bear it, and believe it. So, Merry Christmas everyone whom celebrate it! And can not wait to New Year post!

Ho, Ho, Ho! Fellas, May the miracle of Christmas  fill your heart with warmth and love. Christmas is the time of giving and sharing. It is the time of loving and forgiving. Here’s wishing you all the joys of the season.
Merry Christmas to Everyone!

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